


Enouement

by SleepingBitchy



Category: Ender’s game
Genre: Aliens, Fiction, Love, Other, Science Fiction, War, fan fiction, space
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-12
Updated: 2019-05-30
Packaged: 2019-07-29 21:18:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16272536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SleepingBitchy/pseuds/SleepingBitchy
Summary: “They didn’t bring you to be the commander. You’re not Ender’s back up.”“No, Bean. I’m not.”-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-Enouement - n. The bitter-sweetness of arriving at the future, seeing how things turned out, but not being able to tell your past self.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Playlist for Book One https://open.spotify.com/user/1264543267/playlist/1auK3Ugc6Z3HmxBcJ1gRvt?si=WlwGC1brRDWNBqQydqrh7A

Ender Wiggin. The name that strikes fear, jealousy, and admiration into every being's heart. Except me.

Yes, I had admiration for Ender, but never fear or jealousy. I also, to this day, had another feeling for Ender that not many had. Love. 

Yes many said they loved Ender, but who truly meant it? 

His parents and sister? Of course. His jeesh? Well they were very devoted to Ender, and I am sure they loved him. His Brother? Possibly, though he never admitted it. Why else would he not allow Ender to come home after his victory over the buggers? He protected Ender because he loved him.

At least it seemed that way when the kidnapping started. We now know he couldn't have possibly lived a normal life on Earth. 

I know that I truly loved Ender and that I still do. I love Ender in a way that no one could possibly love him. 

Everyone thought Ender a monster or some non human creature at some point. I'm sure that even Valentine thought him a monster some time or other, but I never did.

Maybe it's because I was with Ender more than anyone else.

I grew up with him, though our child hood was short. We went to Battle School together for far too short a time. I was in an army with him, for awhile, before he had his own army and I was his second in command. I was even a commander against him for a short time. 

They finally separated us for our training. I stayed with the jeesh, and Ender, sweet Ender, was isolated. He wasn't the same after that. They broke him.

I knew as soon as I heard his voice in our training sessions, even though I couldn't see him, that he had changed. I knew by his tone of depression and his cold actions, however small, that they had broken him. 

But I couldn't do anything about it, no one could. We were playing their war games as they broke us one by one. We didn't have the capacity to also worry about Ender. I wasn't allowed to ever see Ender; I wasn't allowed to talk to Ender. He was kept completely alone during our time on Eros.

And so I blame myself for Ender's change. 

For him thinking he was a monster and then believing it, for him having no friends and left to the nightmares of his childhood. I blame myself for everything that happened to Ender once we were separated, even though I know it was a plan. 

Graff and the other adults kept the jeesh together. We improved together; we were each other's strength. We relied and depended on each other. With Ender as our commander we thrived, but they kept him out of our reach. And then they ripped us away from each other.

When I finally saw Ender, after the final battle, he was different. 

Alai first tried to wake him, and Ender instinctively tried to hurt him. We all talked to him, told him how the adults said he was crazy, how we said they were crazy. He hugged Bean and Petra, the ones standing closest to him, and cried. Petra tried to comfort him until he released them. I didn't like the look on his face.

I stepped forward and tried to place my hand on his shoulder, but he smacked it away. I had been amazed at his strength. As I cradled my hand and looked up at Ender he was glaring at me. His eyes had such a ferocity they made me back away.

"Ender?" I had asked. His glare hardened. "Ender what's wrong?" It was then that he lashed out at me.

"What's wrong? What's wrong!? I just whipped out a whole race. I committed a genocide! I just killed a defenseless planet and you're asking me what's wrong!" He yelled pushing me away, but I stood my ground.

"Ender they weren't defenseless. They had star ships with loaded weapons just as we did. They out numbered us a thousand to one and we did what we had to do to survive." I felt sick as I spit back the rehearsed bullshit the adults had fed us. Had I started to believe it?

There was a new fire in his eyes, one that I couldn't describe. But I knew I had seen that fire before. That anger.

In his brother Peter. 

Ender grabbed my shoulders and gripped them hard. I tried to calm myself and not be afraid of him. There would be a bruise waiting for me tomorrow.

"You don't get it! You don't and you never will! You're just like Graff and Mazer! You're just a stupid, selfish, intolerable, little girl!" 

With that he shove me hard against the wall. My back had hit something metal that made me cry out as I landed on the ground. I could feel the blood on my back from whatever I hit. Groaning in pain I looked up at Ender. 

I knew the look in my eyes must have been heart breaking because his expression softened in a second. His face dropped as he looked at my crumpled form on the floor, still cradling my hand, crying silently. No one made a move or a sound. I think they were afraid he would actually hit me, but his eyes were wide and apologetic as he walked slowly towards me.

"Tori...I didn't mean...you know I would never...I'm sorry...I just..." 

I cowered closer to the wall, away from him, he stopped. I could see tears in his eyes and I knew at that moment, even though I was backing away, I didn't think Ender a monster. With a final fleeting look in my direction Ender turned and ran off. 

That was the last time I saw Ender, because I was one of the first to leave. I didn't know till days later, that Ender would not be returning to Earth with the rest of us. I would never see Ender again.


	2. Chapter 2

I met Ender Wiggin before he was know as Ender. I met him when we were just children. Barely more than babies. 

When I met Ender, he was Andrew. A sweet little four-year-old boy. One who was outcasted because he was a third. So when I saw him in the sandbox by himself, I knew I had to befriend him.

"Hi, my names Victorie, what's your name?" I asked as I held my doll.

"Andrew." He seemed confused. No one had probably ever made an effort to talk to him.

"What are you making Andrew?"

"Just a model of the Taj Mahal." He stated as if it was no big deal. I smiled wide in excitement.

"You've got a monitor, don't you?" I exclaimed in a whisper, "That's why none of the other kids will play with you." He nodded.

"So I guess that means you'll go away now too?" He stared down at his hands sadly. I smiled and got down next to him in the sand.

"Why would I do that?" I questioned as I helped him build his sculpture. 

He looked at me with an unreadable expression as I helped him. It didn't take long to finish it and I just had to take a picture of it. I had a camera that hung around my neck just for things like this. I was fascinated with photos.When I looked up from my camera I looked at Ender. The sun was shinning on him and I couldn't help myself. I took a picture of him too.

"Let's go on the swings now Andrew. I'll race you!" That day will forever be in my memory. I didn't know it then but my meeting Ender Wiggin was one of the sole reasons the I.F. wanted me. It was also the reason Ender and I would be together forever. Well in a sense.

Sure I may have been accepted or tested for battle school at some point, but they thought I was an ordinary child. My parents had told me specifically not to show off in school or else I'd go to battle school.

My parents were neo-hippies who frequented cults, which they swear are just misunderstood religions. I thought they were crazy and didn't believe anything they tried to brainwash me with, but I also hadn't wanted to go into space and so I did as they instructed. They didn't want me to go because there was no religion in battle school. War was your religion. I just didn't want to fight anyone.

But just as they monitored Ender, they stared noticing what I did. Before I knew it I had a monitor. I didn't mind so much going to battle school now, if it meant I could stay with Ender.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A Monitor is a device implanted in the back if a child's neck, usually before they are five, that allows the viewer to see, hear, and smell everything the child does. It is as of they are looking through the child's body.
> 
> The I.F. stands for the International Fleet.
> 
> Population Laws had gone into effect throughout the planet and so you could not have more than two kids. The I.F. would authorize parents to have more children if they thought that child would be suitable for Battle school, called Thirds.


	3. Chapter 3

The day I was taken to battle school was a really confusing. My mother had been crying and my father was in a bad mood. Of course I didn't know why. I mean, I was six. The only thing the adults told me was that I was going into space with Ender so we could learn to fight buggers. Apparently my parents knew more.

So when I was in line to get into the shuttle with Ender, we all called him Ender now, I had no idea why my mother was crying. I do remember being scared. Not of going into space of course, no. Not of leaving my parents, who weren't particularly loving. It was all the reporters and camera men that scared me. 

The future saviors of the Earth, especially in America, was big news. They'd parade is in front of the cameras before shipping is off the planet. The camera men and reporters were loud, big, and their flash too bright. They scared me and I did what I always did when I was scared. I grabbed Ender's hand. 

Of course this only encouraged the camera people and reporters. Becoming even more frightened, I hid my face in Ender's chest. "Ender they're scaring me! Make then go away!," I had never been comfortable around adults.

To this Ender chuckled and replied, "Calm down Tori." Of course the press had heard us. Now you have to understand we weren't trying to be cute. I was genuinely afraid of the adults yelling and the flashing lights. And Ender knew this. Since the day we met we had depended on each other. We were independent from everyone but each other.

Ender realized how scared I was and wrapped me in a hug. We didn't know it then but someone had taken a picture of us. I hadn't seen the photo till years later, after the war, but I knew, somehow, that Ender had already seen the photo. 

You couldn't see my face as it was buried in his chest, but Ender's said it all. He had pure joy written on his face. But maybe only me, and possibly Valentine, noticed the fear in his eyes. Just as I was afraid of the press, Ender was afraid to go into space.

When it was my turn to enter the shuttle I looked into Ender's eyes. I saw the fear. I entered the shuttle and found an empty seat. Ender soon followed and once we were buckled into our astronaut like seat belts, I held his hand. They had started a documentary on the I.F. and the first two bugger wars. 

It lasted about an hour and throughout the whole thing I held Ender's hand. By the way he gripped back I knew he appreciated the comfort.

Once the vid ended a man came into view. He introduced himself as Colonel Graff. He noticed our intertwined hands and commented to the whole shuttle about it. Teasing before we even left? Not a good thing.


	4. Chapter 4

Ender of course hadn't heard what Graff had said about us and started laughing out of nowhere. I looked at Ender like he was crazy.

"What do you think is so funny Wiggin?" Graff barked, his voice sharp and angry. I wasn't sure how he knew his name exactly, but I realized he might have monitored Ender. Ender looked confused for a second. Did he not know that he laughed aloud?

"I asked you a question solider!" I pinched his arm.  
"Yes sir." Ender replied after a second.  
"Well answer it then!"

"I thought of you hanging upside down by your feet and thought it was funny."

Some of the boys laughed. As if what Ender was saying was stupid. I wasn't sure what Ender was talking about either, but I knew he probably figured something before the rest of us. I understood a minute later.

There was no gravity in space, which means for all we know, Graff could be hanging by his feet upside down. Of course the other boys still didn't realize this, till Graff pointed it out. Which then made the other boys hate Ender.

What was this guy trying to do? Once Graff pointed out their stupidity and lies he then decided to throw it in their faces that Ender had scored the highest on the test to get into Battle School. He had the best score in the history of Battle School.

I was right behind him in the scores of course, but Graff apparently decided to leave that out. I was pretty sure that by now Ender's life here would be a guaranteed living hell. Graff was singling him out on purpose.

Once he turned around and went to his seat all hell broke lose. Kids were yelling and taunting Ender. I knew Graff wouldn't do anything so I decided to step in. "Why don't you all just leave him alone?" I screamed. "Are you all going to laugh and patronize him because he's smart? Because he's smarter than YOU? You may have been the smartest kid wherever you came from, but in Battle School everyone is smart! And they will all pick on you if you keep picking on the smartest ones. That's how they'll know you don't deserve to be there!" 

All the kids had gone quiet as I crossed my arms over my chest and pouted. I had half a mind to start calling them words I had learned from Peter, Ender's older brother. 

Ender simply laughed at me until I punched his arm. He stopped laughing but smirked coyly at me. Something he had also learned from Peter. I smacked him softer this time and lated my head on his shoulder.

"Wake me up when we get there." He smiled and nodded while striking my hair.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/_

As we got off the shuttle I shook my head at Ender.

"So tell me again how you managed to break some kids arm while I was sleeping?" He smiled and shrugged his shoulders.

"They started it." Before I could retort, Graff walked out of the shuttle.

"Wiggin!" 

"You go on ahead. I'll catch up with you." I nodded hesitantly. I was sort of glad Ender had told me to go on ahead. Graff kind of scared me and I didn't know why. It was just a feeling I got around him. Like he was planning something.

Once I had gotten back to the bunk room the other kids had all picked their beds. The only ones left were the lowest one by the door and the one on top of that. They probably thought they were singling us out by doing this. I stuck my tongue out at the boys and took the one on top of the last one.

"Hey, why were you with that kid?" Someone asked. 

I looked behind me and saw the boy Ender had hurt earlier. A French one at that. The French, being who they were, didn't start teaching Common until the age of four. Because of this, the French dialect and accent had already been instilled in the children. I suppose this would make him popular with the children who had never heard an accent. Exotic almost. This just made him annoying to me.

"Ender? Because he's my friend."

"But why? He's a shrimp and a teacher's pet." As he said this the other kids laughed and agreed. 

"He didn't ask the teacher to say those things!" With that said I turned around and went to the scanner pad on the wall. There was a card attached that instructed me to enter my name twice. "Victorie Sophronia, Victorie Sophronia."

It finally opened and I saw Ender had done the same thing below me. When he had come in, and if he had heard what the French boy said, I didn't know. But I knew he'd find out regardless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so in the Enderverse, the world is *somewhat* united and so the Language required to be learned is Common. Common is basically English but has a slight difference. Common is used in the I.F. and therefore required of any child that goes to battle school.


	5. Chapter 5

My locker popped open along with three other compartments. One had four jumpsuits like the one we were required to wear to the launch, and one white one. Another compartment held a small desk, just like the ones we used at ground school. I guess we weren't done studying yet. The biggest compartment had the best prize. It looked like a spacesuit at first, the old-school kind that we saw in our history lessons. It even had a helmet and gloves, but I knew it couldn't be that. There's no airtight seal but it'll still cover the entire body. Next to it was a pistol, a laser gun it looked like. But why would they let us have-

"Not a laser," send a man. I looked over he wasn't talking to me but Ender. I had never seen him. He was young and kind looking and very handsome.

"But it has a tight enough beam. Well focused. You can shoot and make a 3 inch circle of light on the wall a hundred meters away."  
"What's it for?" Ender asked.   
"One of the games we play here. Does anyone else have his locker open?" I frowned at his male pronoun use but looked around. There was only one other girl besides me, but had very little hair. Her hair was so short I couldnt be sure. Well it wasn't my business to label anyone anyway.

"I mean, have you found the directions and locked in your voices and hands? You can't get into lockers until you do. This room is your home for the first year or so here at battle school, so get the bunk you want and stay with it. Ordinarily we let you select your chief officer and instill him in the lower bunk by the door, but apparently the position has been taken. Can't recode the lockers now so think about who you want to choose. Dinner in seven minutes. Follow the dots on the floor. Your color code is red yellow yellow - - whenever you're assigned a path to follow, it will be red yellow yellow, three dots on my side - - go where those lights indicate. What's your color coding, boys?" I rolled my eyes again, but answered with everyone.

"Red, yellow, yellow."  
"Very good. My name is Dap. I'm your mom for the next few months." They laughed. "Laugh all you like, but keep in mind. If you get lost in the school, which is quite possible, dont go opening doors. Some of the lead outside." more laughter. "Instead just tell someone that your mom is Dap, and they'll call me. Or tell them your color, and they'll light up a path for you to get home." I rolled my eyes. This wasn't home. But Earth also wasn't home now either.

"If you have a problem come talk to me. Remember, I'm the only person here who is paid to be nice to you. But not too nice. Give me any lip and I'll break your face. Okay?"

They laughed again. He had a room full of friends. Frightened children are so easy to win. I looked at Ender, he didn't seem to be buying Dap either.  
"Which way is down, anybody tell me?" They told him.

"Okay that's true. But that direction is toward the outside. The ship is spinning and that's what makes it feel like that is down. The floor actually curves around in that direction. Keep going along enough that way, and you come back to where you start. Except don't try it. Because up that way is teachers quarters and up that way is the bigger kids. And the bigger kids don't like launchies butting in. You might get pushed around. In fact you will get pushed around. And when you do don't come crying to me. Got it? This is battle school not nursery school." I didn't think this qualifies as a school at all if they let us be bullied. But hey what did I know. My parents were neo-hippie cult followers.

"What are we supposed to do then?" Asked a boy, a really small black kid who had a top bunk near mine.  
"If you don't like getting pushed around, figure out for yourself what to do about it. But I warn you - - murder is strictly against the rules. So is deliberate injury. I understand there was an attempt to murder on the way up here. A broken arm. That kind of thing happens again, someone is iced out. You got it?"  
"What's icing out?" Asked a boy, his arm in a splint.  
"Ice. Put out in the cold. Sent Earthside. Finished at battle school." Well they were training us to be killers but they didn't want a little violence?

Nobody looked at Ender. I giggled quietly. Zero-tolerance my ass, I knew they needed Ender. Why else would they accept him at six years old. They wouldn't ice him out.

"So, boys, if any of you thinking of being troublemakers, at least be clever about it, okay?" I understood now. They wanted us to be independent and win by ourselves, fight our own battles. They wanted to know who would be the commanders. 

Dap left and still no one looked at Ender. I hung over my bunk and looked at him. Ender looked uncomfortable. More than that, he looked scared. I could see it now in his face that he didn't want to be here. I knew he didn't care that he had broken that kids arm, that kid was a bully. Just like that one on Earth, Stilson who tried to hurt Ender before. And just like Stilson, this boy was gathering a gang. A little amount of kids, several of the bigger ones. They were all laughing at the far end of the room, and every now and then one of them and turn and look at Ender. 

I could see in his face, that he wanted to go home. I knew that he was thinking the same thing I was. What did all of this, all these kids, all these bullies, have to do with saving the world? There's no monitor now. It was just Ender and I against the gang again, only this time Ender wouldn't let me fight with him. I knew that he would do this alone. Like when he faced Peter, but wouldnt let Valentine help.  
I jumped down into his bunk, but the fear was on his face was still there. I grabbed his hand and dragged him to dinner. 

No one sat with us at the mess hall. The other boys are talking about things - - the big scoreboard on one wall, the food, the bigger kids. Ender only watched. I squeezed his hand under the table. I knew he is feeling isolated, but I was here with him. He wouldn't be alone as long as I was here.

The scoreboards were team standings. Win - loss records, with the most recent scores. Like sports teams. Some of the bigger boys apparently had bets on the most recent games. Two teams Manticore and Asp, had no recent score - - that box was flashing. They must be playing right now.

All the older boys, and I say boys because they were very few girls, were divided into two groups, according to the uniforms they wore.

Some with different uniforms were talking together, but generally the groups had their own area. Launchies - Their own group, and the two or three next older groups - all had plain blue uniforms. But the big kids, the ones that were in teams, they are wearing much more flamboyant clothing. 

I can tell which ones were which name. Scorpion, spider, flame, tide. I did try and guess the colors, but some are harder. Out of nowhere a big boy, much bigger than the normal size boys, sat next to Ender. He looked about 12 or 13, and completely ignored me.  
"Hi," he said only to Ender.   
"Hi."  
"I'm Mick."  
"Ender."   
"That's a name?"  
"Since I was little. It's with my sister called me. And Tori."  
"Victorie. But only call me Tori." He ignored me again.  
"Not a bad name here. Ender. Finisher. Hey."  
"Hope so ." No he didn't.   
"Ender, you the bugger in your launch?" He shrugged and I looked away.

"I noticed you eating all alone," I glared, "every launch has one like that. nobody takes to you right away," I took to him before we got here, "sometimes I think the teachers do it on purpose. The teachers aren't very nice. You'll notice that." Well Ender had already experienced that. I had too I guess. "So you the bugger?"   
"No he's not!" I didn't like this kid. Ender simply shrugged at my answer.   
"Hey. Nothing to cry about, you know?" He gave Ender his roll and took his pudding, but I glared and gave him mine, leaving Ender with pudding and an extra roll. 

He started talking about how he was a nothing here, washed up, didn't amount to much. Ender smiled and listened politely. But I knew he was thinking what I was, why are you giving me advice then, why should I listen to you? Ender was too polite, I wasn't. "Why are you telling us this?"

He looked at me as if only just noticing I was here. He stared me up and down, and I gave a disgusted look. I was six, and he was just entering puberty. I had to remind myself that there were not many girls up here, and I have to be careful while I was here. The adults sure wouldn't help. He seemed to remember where we were after a minute, and gave me a look.

"Are you a smart mouth? Shut up and eat." I would've jumped across the table at him and hit him, no matter how big he was. But Ender discreetly grabbed my hand under the table and shook his head as he smiled. He picked up the roll and started eating. Ender was definitely too polite.

I knew he was worried about ending up like this, but I wouldn't let it happen. I had to make sure that Ender would find his place here, without losing himself. I would help Ender, no matter what. I could see a determination in his eyes. I didn't know it then, but this was the first time that I start losing Ender, my Ender, started losing him to what he had become. This place, the school, they tested us for ambition. If you didn't plan on using it, they were going to make you. They would force it out of you.

Ender looked over at me and smiled, and just like that my Ender was back. I would later get used to these mood swings, but for now I was unaware. He looked sad, and I did see tears in his eyes. I wonder if I remind him of home? He reminded me of home, of course he probably missed his parents. 

He Definitely missed Valentine, I could be a substitute for her. I held his hands gently under the table, he couldn't cry here. He can look weak, he can't give the boys another reason to torture him, I couldn't let him. He squeezed back and closed his eyes. I knew what he was doing. He does this every time Peter tormented him. He counted doubles. He told me he had gone as high as 67108864 before. Of course Peter's torture sessions weren't known to be quick. After a while he didn't look so sad anymore, he looked stronger.

Later that night when the lights were dim, I could hear several of the other children whimpering for their mothers or fathers or dogs. I knew Ender too cried for Valentine, but I cannot heal the wound that was left from his departure from her. I cry too but for different Reason. 

I didn't miss my parents that much, I didn't miss home, or even school. I had Ender here, and so nothing should be wrong. But there was. I was afraid, afraid of the adults, afraid of the older kids, I was afraid of war. I didn't come here because I wanted to, never because I wanted to. I was not a third, my parents were not in the military, and they did not want me here. We could have refused. But no, I wanted to be with Ender. My sweet, sweet, Ender. For him I decided I would leave my home and go up to space with him to live until we are too old to even remember what our parents look like. But I was afraid still, afraid of losing Ender. I could see it today if only for a second, that I could lose Ender. Or at least the Ender I knew. I was afraid he would become something unrecognizable to me.

Dap came later that night. He moved along the bunks touching a hand here rubbing a shoulder there. But where he went there was more crying, not less. The touch of kindness in this frightening place was enough to push some on the edge, to tears. But I heard no more from Ender. And when Dap came over to me, my face was dry. I knew that Ender had had to use his face, his lying face. The one he used after Peter had been cruel to him, but he did not want his parents to know. 

I wish he didn't have to use it.


	6. Chapter 6

I was right, as usual. We still had school. Every day there were classes. Reading. Numbers. History. Videos of the bloody battles in space. The marines splattering blood all over the walls of the bunker ships. Holos of clean wars of the fleet, ships turning into puffs of light as a spacecraft killed each other deafly in the deep night. 

Many things to learn, But I didn't care as long as I was with Ender. We worked hard, as hard as anyone. Most of us struggled for the first time in our lives, for the first time in our lives we competed with classmates who are at least as right as we were. For the first time Ender competed with me. 

"Are you okay?" I sat on his table before class started. He continued typing at his desk. "I was thinking later we can go to the arcade? Most of the big kids have battles today, so it should be really empty -"

"I don't have as good a handle on this is you do Tori, I don't have time to waste in the arcade." He didn't look up at me. Just kept typing. My face fell and I dejectedly walked away. 

"Right. Sorry Ender I wasn't thinking." That was the second time I noticed a change in Ender. I heard him sigh and place his desk down.

"No Tori I'm sorry. I just, I really want to do well here. I don't want to have left home for nothing. I didn't mean to be so cold to you." I smiled, turned around, and kissed his cheek. 

"Never Ender. I can help you with it if you want?" Any time this happened, well anytime Ender realized how he acted, he apologized and we can quickly made up. I can never stay mad at him.

The best thing we learned here though, were the games. That's what everyone looks for. That was what filled the hours between waking and sleeping.   
Dap introduce us to a game room. It was up, way above the decks where the boys, and us few girls lived and worked. We became lost in the weakened gravity and there in the caravan we saw the dazzling lights of the games.

Some of the games we knew some some we had even played at home. Simple ones and hard ones. We passed a two-dimensional game on video and begin to look at them more closely. The bigger boys play the holographic games with objects you bring in the air. I stood next to Ender and observed with him. We had strayed from our group and away from Dap. Every now and then we get shoved from the bigger kids, but I wasnt about to leave Ender here by himself. That was until he ran into someone. Then I'd cart him away from them as fast as I could.

Every time though, he went back. He was too curious for his own good. Can get to a different spot at least, a different angle, so you can observe the game. We're too short to see the controls and how the game is actually done. It didn't matter much. It's in the movement in there, the way the player dug the tunnels in the darkness tunnels of light, which the enemy ships at search for and then follow mercilessly into the player got the players ships. 

The player can make traps, mines, drifting bombs, flips in the air that for sending me ships to repeat endlessly. Some of the players were clever, most were not. Ender and I both liked it better though when they boys played against each other. Then they had a use each other's tunnels and it quickly became clear which one of them was worth anything at the strategy of it.

"I thought only the best of the best were accepted here. I guess they get whoever looks like they might have potential, and need them to play games like this." I bit my lip.

"We need to be careful Ender."   
"They're only analyzing us Tori, and we know they are, so don't give them anything that we don't want them to have. Besides, if we don't play at all they'll get suspicious. They know that you're as smart as anyone here, maybe more. This is just to see if we can strategize and be a leader."

I pouted, but I knew it was right. Of course with my hippie parents, I was taught that I had a right to privacy, and something about the government watching me and observing didn't sit right with me. Even if these adults were in charge of me, and the fate of the world. 

We watch the games for an hour, until sure exactly how to play and what to do to win. Think like a machine instead of a boy, and you could win against anyone. Well I could win against them and Ender could. But against each other? I don't know.   
"I'd like a turn against you," Ender said to the boy who had just won. 

"Lawsy me, what is this? is it a bug or a bigger?"  
"I new flock of dwarfs just came aboard," Another boy answered. I want to retort, I wanted to curse them, but Ender and I were small for our age, and Ender had a plan. 

"So you're afraid to play me two out of three?"  
"Beating you would be as easy as pissing in the shower."  
"And not half as fun." I scrunched my nose in disgust. I guess is what happens when you put a bunch of boys on an asteroid without anyone telling them what to do. They just get more disgusting.

"I'm Ender Wiggin."   
"Listen up scrunch face you're no one! You're nobody. Got that? You're nobody, got that? You're not nobody till you gots you're first kill. Got that?" 

I whispered in Ender's ear, "He must be talking about the game, the one the older boys play." The boy was speaking in a slang, at least I hope you was. I really hope they didn't have anyone illiterate here. It did have a rhythm though, and was easy enough to pick up.

"If I'm nobody, then how come you scared to play me two out of three?"  
They were getting impatient. 

"Kill the square quick and let's get on with it. But maybe leave his cute little friend." Ender stepped half in front of me trying to draw the attention away to him. The boys were getting agitated. I pushed him towards the game, they were going to let him play.

He took the controls. His hands maybe small but they were simple enough. It took a minute to find out what button did what. The other boy, his name we didn't know, got ahead quickly. But he learned a lot and was doing much better by the time the game and ended. I knew he wanted more though.

"Satisfied launchy?"  
"Two out of three."  
"We don't allow two out of three games." I didn't want Ender to push his luck with these boys. Everyone here was so violent, but maybe that's because of what I was used to, which wasn't them. I had a feeling that they wouldn't hesitate to hit Ender. I dont want to think of what they would do to me.

"So you beat me the first time I ever touched the game," Ender said. "if you can't do it twice, you can't do it at all." I pinched his arm from behind. 

They played again, and this time he was deft enough to pull off a few maneuvers that the boy had obviously never seen before. Ender didn't win easily, but he won.

The bigger boys stopped laughing and joking then. I looked around nervously as more show up. Third game in total silence. Ender won quickly and efficiently. But it ended, one of the older boys said, "Bout time they replace this machine. Getting so any pinbrain can beat it now."

No one congratulated him. No one looked happy for him. Just silence as Ender walked away and got my hand. We didn't get far just off to the distance nearby. We watched as the next players try to use the things that Ender had already done. 

"Any pinbrain huh?" I giggled as Ender smiled slightly. I knew he had it felt better now, that he won something against this older boys. Maybe not the best of the older boys, but maybe now he didn't feel that he was out of his wits here. That battle school might not be so much for him now, and maybe now he wouldn't feel so threatened by me. At least that's what I hoped. I didn't know what the teachers would do to us later.


	7. Chapter 7

Ender and I didn't make many friends. In fact for a while, we didn't have any other friends at all. The boy whose arm he had broken, the mouthy French one, was out for vengeance. Just as I knew before, his accent made him exotic and interesting; his broken arm made him a martyr; his sadism made him a natural force for all those who love pain in others. We became the enemy.

"Ender?" He looked up from his desk.  
"Yeah Tori?" I bit my lip.   
"This won't be like..." I lowered my voice. "like Stilson... right?" Ender furrowed his eyebrows confused. 

"We're already getting picked-"  
"That's not what I mean. If something happens, if they gang up on us, if you lose control-" He looked angry. 

"I was protecting you! There were six of them twice our size. I had to stop him. Stop him so he'd never come after us again." I bit my lip and looked away. For good... Ender didn't know the damage he had done to Stilson that day. I had heard the adults talking about it. 

But he wasn't wrong. They were already picking on us. Little things first. Kicking Ender's bed every time they went in and out of the door. Jostling him with his meal tray. Tripping him over the ladders. Ender learned quickly not to leave anything of his outside his locker.

"Maladroit," I had heard Bernard call him once, and the name stuck. They were different to me, but still cruel.   
I was tripped, and jostled, they pulled my hair, and put food in its long locks. They were careful however never to do it by a teacher, and never in front of the Ender. I think they're still afraid of him, after he broke Bernard's arm. I don't think they want to know what Ender would do to them, if he found out they were also picking on me. 

"They're not doing anything to you, right Tori?" I didn't tell him. I didn't want to find out what Ender would do to them. So I smiled softly and shook my head.

I could tell Ender was getting angry. Angry at Bernard, and angry at all those so willing to follow him.

"Hey, they'll get bored soon. Then move on to something or someone else and we won't worry about this anymore." He sighed.   
"But I don't want them to just start picking on someone else. Bernard is a bully, and he can't get away with this. They're already picking on other people now, this moment. It's not just me." 

At this rate Bernard was setting up a kingdom. It was like he was the king and there was a hierarchy already established. He built himself up around the others. Some were useful to him and he flattered them outrageously. Some were willing servants, doing whatever he wanted, even if he treated them with contempt.

But there are a few like us. I knew who resented Bernard the most. Shen was small, ambitious, and easily needled. Bernard had discovered that quickly, and started calling him worm.   
"Because he's so small," Bernard said. "Because he wriggles. Look how he shimmies his butt when he walks."

Shen stormed off, but they only laughed louder. "Look at his butt! Seeya, Worm!" I tried to go over to Shen, to defend him, but Ender grabbed my arm and shook his head. 

"But Ender-"   
"It's okay." I could see the glint in his eye. He had a plan. We couldn't help Shen now, or else everyone would know we were behind whatever Ender was about to do. He just went back to his desk and continued typing. I brought out mine and tried to look studious. The boys would assume we were working on the homework, and I needed to bring little attention to Ender and I. 

He tapped my knee and smiled before motioning to his desk, and then to Shen. I tried to catch Shen's eye and lifted my desk slightly. Shen looked puzzled. He picked up his desk and Ender pressed send. Shen started laughing almost immediately. I looked down at my desk screen and started cracking up. Shen looked over at Ender and I, like asking if we had done it. I shook my head and Ender shrugged.

Shen laughed again, and some of the boys not so close to Bernard picked up their own desks. Every thirty seconds a message appeared on every desk, marched around the screen, before disappearing. The boys all laughed together. 

"What's so funny?" Bernard asked. Ender's smile wiped off his face instantly, and I snickered behind my hands. Shen of course, smiled all the more defiantly. Bernard got one of his boys to bring their desk, and they read the message together. 

COVER YOUR BUTT. BERNARD IS WATCHING -GOD 

Bernard went red and started shouting, trying to find out who did it.   
"God." Shen answered smugly.   
"It sure as hell wasn't you. This takes too much brains for a worm!" 

Ender's message expired after five minuets. I looked to his desk after I heard a new message sound. 

I KNOW IT WAS YOU -BERNARD

I was worried, worried for Ender, but I didn't let my face show it. Ender kept his stoic. Bernard couldn't know. He just wanted to catch Ender looking guilty. And it didn't matter anyways. Bernard had to rebuild his reputation, so he'd torment everyone. All these boys with their egos and Alexander complex, I knew he wouldn't stand for everyone laughing at him. 

So in the morning when I'd heard that Ender had gotten knocked down in the shower, I wasn't surprised. I was still angry though. One of the bigger boys had managed to plant a knee in Ender's belly, and he took it in silence. I wanted to defend Ender but he forbade me. 

"You can't just expect me to watch them hurt you." I didn't want Ender to fight them. I didn't want him to become that scary Ender who had beat Stilson. I wanted to protect Ender to avoid that. "At least let me tell Dap."

"You know as well as I do that it won't do anything. If anything, it'll make it worse." Ender sighed but looked determined. He was thinking of a new plan.


	8. Chapter 8

Ender did nothing, and he forbade me from doing anything as well. They continued to pick on him, both physically and verbally. But I watched Ender and he watched them. In the war of desks, he had his next attack in place. I had just gotten out of the shower and back to my bunk when Bernard started raging, kicking beds and yelling at the boys.  
"I didn't write it! Shut up!" Marching constantly around everyones desk was this message: 

I LOVE YOUR BUTT. LET ME KISS IT -BERNARD 

I glanced down from my bunk and smirked at Bernard. "I'm pretty sure thats sexual-harassment, in my case anyway. Unless you only want the boys butts Bernard."   
"I didn't write that message!" He shouted. After the shouting have been going on for sometime, Dap appeared at the door.

"What's the fuss?" I scurried down to Ender's bunk, not wanting him alone.   
"Somebody's been writing messages using my name." Bernard was sullen.   
"What message?"

"It doesn't matter what message!"  
"It does to me." Dap picked up the nearest desk, which happened to belong to me. Dap read it, smiled slightly, and put it back. "Very interesting."

"Are you going to find out who did it?" Bernard demanded.  
"Oh, I already know who did it," Dap said. I side glanced at Ender. The system was too easily broken. They mean us to break it, or sections of it. They had to of known it was him.

"Well, who then?" Bernard shouted.  
"Are you shouting at me, soldier?" Asked Dap, very softly. That's right, we were soldiers now. No longer kids in the classroom, who tattle to the adult. We were soldiers, and we had to follow the rules. No shouting at your commanding officer. Stupid Bernard. He wouldn't help you now. 

The mood in the room had changed. From rage on the part of Bernard's closest friends and barely contained mirth among the rest, all became somber. Authority was about to speak.

"No, sir."  
"Everybody knows that the system automatically puts on the name of the sender."  
"I didn't write that!" Bernard said.  
"Shouting?"   
"Yesterday someone sent a message that was signed GOD," Bernard said.

"Really? I didn't know he was signed onto the system." I bit my lip and snickered with Ender as Dap turned and left. All the other boys weren't as polite with their laughter. 

Bernards attempt to be rule the room was broken - only a few stayed with him now. They were the most vicious. Still the hacking of the system had done it's work. Bernard was contained, and all the boys who had some quality were free of him. Best of all, Ender had done it without sending him to the hospital. Much better this way. Much better than Stilson. I was proud of Ender. 

"You know we have to design a security system for our own desks now, right? The system is so easy a six-year-old can break it, we wont be safe from the others when they figure that out." Ender smiled.   
"Well you'd be fine, but I've already started on mine. No one's going to get into it." 

The next day at breakfast Ender and I weren't so lonely. Shen actually join us for a meal. "How did you do that?"  
I smiled softly at Shen and giggled while looking at Ender.  
"Do what?"

"Send a message with a fake name. And Bernard's name! That was great. They're calling him buttwatcher now. Just watcher in front of the teachers, but everybody knows what he's watching."

"Poor bernard. And he's so sensitive," I said trying to keep a straight face.  
"Come on, Ender. You broke into the system. How'd do you do it?"  
"Thanks for thinking I'm bright enough to do that. I just happened to see it first, that's all."   
"Did you do it then Victorie?" Shen turned to me confused. I stuck out my tongue at him.

"Though you obviously don't think I'm capable of it, I didn't do it. I had just seen it with Ender." Shen blushed and looked down at the table.

"No I didn't mean-" I giggled as Ender elbowed me.  
"Stop teasing Tori." We ate in silence for a moment. 

"Do I wiggle my butt when I walk?"  
"Nah." Ender and I both answered.   
"Just a little, just-"  
"Don't take such big long steps, that's all." He laughed, at what we didn't know. But then he smiled at us.

"Do you always do that? Finish each other sentences? I thought you weren't siblings." We laughed then too. Ender held my hand softly under the table. 

"Tori and I are just really close. We've known each other for a while and grew up together. We got our monitors off together." I smiled and kissed his cheek, which made Shen blush. I laughed at him again, and two more Launchies joined us. Our isolation was over. At least I hoped the adults were done isolating us.


	9. Chapter 9

We all filed clumsily into the battle room, like children in a swimming pool for the very first time, clinging to the handholds along the side. Null gravity was frightening, disorienting; we soon found that things went better if we didn't use our feet at all.  
The worst thing about it were these suits that we had to wear. The jumpsuits were confining. We cant make precise movements, because the suit bent just a bit slower, resisted a bit more than any clothing I or any of us had ever worn before.

I grabbed a handhold and flexed my knees. It was hard to get started, the suit made it hard to move quickly. But after I stop moving the suit did not. I knew I'd be clumsy for a while.

"You need help?" Ender had come to the same conclusion as me, and help out his hand. 

I smiled. "On three?" We counted silently in our heads, grasped a handhold, and pushed strongly with our feet. Instantly we flipped around, feet flying overhead, hands still held, and flat against our backs against the wall. The rebound was stronger, and Ender's hand lost the handhold. He'd have flown if I hadn't caught his hand first. I didn't anticipate how strongly he'd have rebounded though, and we tumbled and flew across the battleroom.

The feeling was sickening. There was no gravity here, and so my body kept searching for it. I had to remind myself that there was no up - and - down orientation here. I had to change my view. Ender had thought all this before me, I could see it on his face. I let go of his hand so he could finish his thought process. It would come to me soon enough. I was trying to reorient myself, not according to what I knew gravity was, but what I needed it to be. I convinced myself that I wasn't falling, but flying up. I was going too fast to catch a handhold and stay, but maybe I could soften the impact. 

Ender went the opposite way, but seem to have the same idea as me. We rebounded off opposite walls and flew past each other laughing high-fiving. By the time we got to where we were headed, we both crashed against the wall and floated for a minute. Our velocity was gone.

"What are you trying to do, kill yourselves?" asked Shen. I giggled and Ender cracked up  
"Try it. The suit keeps you from hurting yourself, and you can control your bouncing with your leggings, like this." 

He demonstrated the movement we had figured out only moments before. Shen shook his head - he wasn't trying any fool stunt like that. But one boy did take off, not as fast as Ender and I had, because he didn't begin with a the flip, but fast enough. I didn't even have to see his face to know that it was Bernard. And right after him, Bernard's best friend, Alai. 

I watched them cross the room, Bernard was struggling to orient himself to the direction he thought of as the floor. Alai surrendered to the movement and prepared to rebound from the wall. No wonder Bernard broke his arm in the shuttle, I thought and snickered. He tightens up when he's flying. He panics. It wasn't a big leap that Ender had broken his arm.

Alai did not push off in the same direction as Bernard. He aimed for a corner of the room. Their paths diverged more and more as they flew. Where Bernard made a clumsy, crunching landing and bounced on his wall, Alai did a glancing triple bounce on three surfaces near the corner that left him most of his speed and sent him flying off at a surprising angle. Alai shouted and whooped and so did the boys watching him. Some of them forgot their weightlessness and let go of the wall to clap their hands. Now they drifted lazily in many directions, waving their arms, trying to swim.

"That won't work right? If you start drifting you can't catch yourself. How do you push off then?" I turned toward Ender who was near me now.   
"Trial and error?" He suggested.  
"But I can't think of anything that those idiots aren't already doing. No use in us drifting now too."

"No, but maybe a different trial." Ender smirked as he held on with one hand and fiddled with the toy gun attached to our suits with the other. I remembered the hand rocket sometimes used by Marines when they did a boarding assault on an enemy station. I smirked back at Ender and pulled out my gun and examined it. 

The gun hadn't worked back in the room, but we were in the battle room now. If the suit was different here, maybe the gun was as well. There were no instructions or labels for the controls. Just two buttons that my thumb could easily reach, several others along the bottom of the shaft that were almost inaccessible without using two hands, and the trigger. We looked at each other, and aimed the guns at the floor, then pulled back on the trigger. 

I could feel the gun grow warmer; When I released the trigger it became cold at once. Also, a tiny circle of light appeared in the floor where we had aimed. The red button at the top of the gun did the same. The white button however gave a bright flashlight that illuminated a wide area. It was cold when that button was pressed. 

"Okay so red button makes it like a laser -"  
"But it's not a laser Dap said-"  
"While the white button makes it like a lamp -"  
"But that won't help while maneuvering."  
"So then everything depends on how we push off!" I smiled confidently. "We'll have to become better at controlling our launches and rebounds. Don't wanna just end up drifting."

We looked around at the other boys in the room. A few were getting close to the walls now, flailing their arms to catch a handle. Most are bumping into each other laughing; some were even holding hands and going around in circles. Only a few, like Ender and myself, were calmly holding onto the walls and watching. 

One of them was Alai. He ended up on another wall not too far from us. Ender pushed off quickly towards him. I followed after, not trusting him alone with Alai. Alai is Bernard's friend. What could Ender possibly have to say to him? Still there was no turning course now. And I would back him up no matter what. It was too late by the time I realized that he wasn't going towards Alai, he was going to hit him.

"Here, snag my hand!" Alai called. I watched as Ender held out his hand. Alai took the shock of impact and helped Ender make a fairly gentle landing against the wall. I landed above them and grabbed a handhold quickly before moving down to them.

"You idiot! You could've gotten hurt." I smacked Ender with my free hand and he sheepishly smiled at me.  
"So my aim is a little off," I scoffed. "We outta practice this kind of thing more, that's all." 

"That's what I thought, only everybody's turning to butter out there. What happens if we get out there together? We should be able to push each other in opposite directions."  
"Yeah?"   
"OK?"  
"Go ahead."

He took Alai by the wrist ready to push off. Since they pushed off with different amounts of force, they began to circle each other. Ender made some small hand movements, then shifted a leg. They slowed. He did it again. They stopped orbiting and began drifting evenly.

"Oh look Ender, you didn't break any ones arm!" He smiled at me and I stuck my tongue out before pushing off to them. 

"Packed head, Ender," Alai praised him. "Try with us now Tori? We need to push off before we run into that bunch." I grasped both their hands, and with my momentum shifted us slightly over so that we could bounce off the wall. We all pushed hard, and floated together through the room. Holding Ender's hand was like second nature to me, but holding Alai's hand was new. I giggled, but was happy that I got to be in the middle.

"How about we meet in that corner?" Ender asked as we started to slow and drift. We turned then slowly, steadily, maneuvered until we faced each other all three spreadeagled. Hand to hand, knee to knee. "Do we just scrunch?"  
Ender shrugged and I snorted. 

"Yes, because we are the experts on null gravity."   
"Last one saves farts in a milk bottle!" I rolled my eyes. Boys. We pushed off, and propelled faster than we had expected. Ender ran into a couple boys and bounced on the wall that he hadn't expected. It took awhile to reorient and find the corner where we were supposed to meet. Alai was headed towards it, but I was ahead of them. 

I knew it would take Ender two extra rebounds, to avoid a large cluster of boys drifting about. When he reached the corner, Alai had hooked his arms through two adjacent handholds and was pretending to doze. I stared at Ender as if only seeing him for the first time. 

"Thought you were the smart one?"  
"I want to see your fart collection," Alai said.  
"Its stored in your locker. Didn't you notice?"  
"I thought it was my socks."  
"We don't wear socks anymore," I mused.  
"Oh yeah." It was a reminder of home. The home far far away from us. Actually it took some of the fun of having mastered a bit of this navigation. I took out my pistol and demonstrated what We'd learned about the two buttons to Alai.

"What happens when you're aimed at someone else?"Alai asked. I smiled devilishly.  
"Let's find out."   
Ender shook his head.   
"We might hurt somebody."

"Come on Ender this is like the one time to not be a pacifist. And anyways would they give it to us if it could really hurt somebody?"  
"Just in the foot then," Alai reasoned. "I don't want to hurt you. I'm not Bernard, and I don't hurt cats for fun."  
"You're joking right?" I asked.  
"Yeah, he likes squirrels." He deadpanned. Ender and Alai started arguing about who should shoot who. Not realizing that they could just shoot each other. 

I rolled my eyes, took out my pistol, and swiped Ender's from his holster without him knowing. I shot them both in the foot. immediately the leg of the suits grew stuff and immobile at the knee and ankle joints.  
"Cool it's like a freeze ray."  
"You frozen?"  
"Stiff as a board."  
"Let's freeze them. Let's have our first war. Us three against all of them." I tossed Ender's pistol back to him and we grinned.

"Ambush. Classic." I praised.  
"Better invite Bernard" I stared incredulously at Ender. Alai cocked an eyebrow. "Let's go get Bernard and Shen and freeze these bugger lovers." 

In 20 minutes, everyone in the room is frozen except Ender, Bernard, Shen, Alai, and I. We all sat in the air laughing until Dap came in.

"I see you learned how to use your equipment." Then he did something to a control he held in his hand. it maneuvered everyone slowly towards the wall he was standing on. He moved among the frozen boys touching them, thawing their suits. The boys complained that it wasn't fair how Bernard and Alai had shot them all and they weren't ready.

"Why weren't you ready? You had your suits just as long as they did. You had just as many minutes flapping around like drunken ducks. Stop moaning and we'll begin."

I love how it was assumed that Bernard and Alai were the leaders of the battle. That was fine, I knew Ender didn't really mind. Bernard knew that Ender, Alai and I had learned to use the guns together. And Ender, Alai, and I were now friends. Bernard might believe that we had joined his group, but that wasn't it. We joined a new group. Alai's group. Bernard had just joined it too. 

It was an obvious to everyone; Bernard still had his cronies on errands. But the mood in the whole room had changed. When Bernard was crazy, Alai could joke a little and calm him down. When it came time to choose a launch leader later, Alai was the almost unanimous choice.

Bernard sulked a few days and then he was fine and everyone settled into the new routine. We no longer were separated into Bernard's in-group and Ender's-outcast. Alai was the bridge. Alai was peace.


	10. Chapter 10

Ender sat on his bed with his desk on his knees. It was private study time, and I could see that he was playing the fantasy game. 

It was a shifting, crazy kind of game in which the school computer kept bringing up new things, building a maze that you could explore. You can go back to events that you liked, for a while; if you left them alone too long they disappeared and something else took its place. 

Sometimes funny things. Sometimes exciting. And you had to be quick to stay alive. You died a lot, but that was okay. You died until you got the hang of it. I didn't like the fantasy game. 

The way it adapted, the way it changed, to all the choices that you made. Well It didn't sit right with me. It felt like the computer was actually in my head, like the adults were in my head. And maybe they were. Why else would they let us play this game? It adapted to our choices and personality, it knew us like the back of its virtual hand. It was as if they were analyzing us with it. 

They encouraged us to play this game, practically demanded we play the game. I didn't like it. It reminded me of the stories that my parents use to tell me. About how long ago in America, the government analyzed and watched and controlled everything that you did. There was no privacy. I liked my privacy. I didn't like being analyzed. I didn't like these adults in my head. And so I didn't play it. 

Ender didn't have such qualms about playing the fantasy game. I watched as his character, a large mouse, placed in front of a giant. He had to guess which glass held poison, out of the two, in order to pass. I had seen Ender play the scene quite often, but no matter what he never won. Again and again, again and again, Ender died each time. 

I jumped down into his bunk and watched him play. I didn't know why he kept trying, or why he was so determined to beat this giant. What I saw next scared me. Ender had his character kick one of the glasses over and then the other, and jumped at the Giants face. He began to dig into the giant's eyes. Stuff started coming out, like cottage cheese, and it spilled all over the screen. Ender's figure burrowed itself deeper into the eye. In and in and in. 

The giant fell over backwards. Ender had killed no, he had maimed the giant. I was pretty sure no one else had done so. He moved over into the next scene, still not noticing me in his bunk watching. A little bat flew up around him and started talking.  
"How did you get here? Nobody ever comes here." Ender couldn't answer back. Instead he reached down, took a handful of the giants eye stuff, and offered it to the bat. The bat took it and flew off, shouting as it went, "Welcome to Fairyland."

I had never seen, or heard even, any of the other boys talking about this place. This fairyland. The game even told him that no one had came there before. It made my stomach turn, something wasn't right. Ender signed off instead of exploring, and noticed me there next to him. 

He looked shocked for a minute and then afraid. Afraid of me? No. Afraid that I had seen what he had done. He didn't just kill the giant, he murdered him. It was a gruesome death. It reminded me of Peter. I couldn't tell Ender that. 

So instead I smiled, "Are you ready to go to dinner?"

I had to pretend like I hadn't seen that. I had to pretend that I hadn't felt as if I was looking at Peter, cruel Peter. Instead of my Ender, my sweet Ender. I grabbed his hand and called to Alai, Shen, and Bernard as I dragged him out of the bunk. 

"I'm hungry so hurry up!" We all walked together in the halls, laughing and shoving. I kept hold of Ender's hand and smiled as I spoke to him, but I knew he didn't believe that I hadn't seen what he did. And I knew that he was thinking of Peter too.


End file.
